The Summer classes have been completed successfully, although not without frustration. Three 16-week classes condensed into 4-week cram sessions that took every bit of strength not to drop. The content was crucial but learning and retaining anything was impossible. All three were very technical and could not be reduced because each new section relied on understanding the previous so any attempt to avoid completing the material again is futile. Each semester has been a puzzle that I study and figure out how to navigate balancing learning, passing, seeing my family, keeping a full-time job, and any other everyday tasks that we all perform just to keep things from falling apart. It is without any question that the only reason I have the ability, courage, and resiliency to keep going is the support I have from Pubba. Today is our anniversary and as I woke up this morning, I kept realizing that I probably would not be waking up at this very moment if it were not for her in my life. Words, written or spoken, cannot express the truth in the previous sentence, although I will try. My thoughts keep concluding that the drive I have to be a better father, husband and advocate for myself is in my desire to not let her down. It is also equally my desire not to let myself down as well, but this was not always the case. When I had great ideas  to go back to school or get healthy, I always lacked the motivation to get thought into action. You can get addicted to ideas that you know would improve your life but never actually make any progress. Paralysis by analysis you could say but it is a deeper issue, I think. Fear is the biggest one for me and the lack of confidence. She changed  all that for me. This was not instant or even early on after we met but we were both stubborn and she was a little more than me so here we are. The important change was using her confidence in me to build my own. I don’t want to disappoint myself OR her. She gives me the strength to be an advocate for me and my community as well. I don’t know where she pulls the energy from to inspire me and for herself. For someone who has for his whole life tried to avoid recognition and praise, I cannot wait to tell her something that I have done or accomplished. She has taught me that it is good to be proud and to let others know. As I was thinking of some incredible gift, I wanted to surprise her with for our anniversary I had only one thought the came to mind. Tell her how proud she makes you feel. I am a better person because of you. Happy anniversary Amy!